Friday, September 18, 2009

My friend Andrea

I originally shared this with my church group back on February 23, 2009, but after getting news last night that the end is truly near, I wanted to post this here on my blog. I ask for prayers for Andrea and her family.

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"In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves.. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our responsibility." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt ~

My friend Andrea is going to die.

She’s been fighting breast cancer for over a year now and on Friday she got the following news from her doctor: “It's stage 4, there is no cure, only managing the disease. I have multiple extensive lesions in my liver. The liver can accommodate tumors and still function, but they ran a blood test just to make sure. As for my bones, it is in the spine, shoulders, sternum, ribs and femur.”

And so, my friend Andrea is going to die.

We’re ALL going to die one day, I know that. From the minute we are born, we are all dying. Just at different rates. If you think about death that way, it makes it a tad less scary. To me, anyway.

But still…my friend Andrea is going to die. Much too young. Much too soon.

I met her through our mutual love of romance novels (don’t judge!) when we both found our way a decade ago to an internet bulletin board dedicated to my then-favorite author Judith McNaught. Through this wonderful group of women, spread throughout the country and the world, I have made some true friends. Good women. Smart women. Doctors, lawyers, teachers, stay-at-home moms. Slightly nutty women, but then again, they are my friends, right?

I stayed in Drea’s home when I interviewed for a job at Texas A&M 7 years ago. When I lived in Dubai, we’d chat almost every day on instant messenger as I was wrapping up my day and eating dinner and she was just kick starting her day back in College Station. She’s funny and beautiful and gutsy and a fighter.

And she’s going to die.

I’ve cried A LOT the past few days. I’m crying as I type this. It’s not fair. Nothing like this is ever fair to anyone. I pray for Andrea every time I think of her, which is at least once an hour. I figure God’s going to get so sick of hearing the name Andrea that He’s going to give us the miracle we desperately need to save her life.

That’s what I pray for, but I’m also a realist. I know how bad it is. I know the statistics. I know my friend Andrea is going to die. I just don’t know when.

I tell you all that so that you’ll remember to appreciate the people in your life. So that you’ll remember to appreciate YOUR life. Love your family. Love your friends. Look for friends all over the place. It’s amazing sometimes how the people you’d never imagine being friends with can become the best friends in the entire world.

Call them. Write them. Send them a flippin’ e-mail. I don’t care what you do, but keep in touch. If they mean something to you, make sure they know it.

And lastly, take care of yourself ‘cause God don’t make no junk. I won’t tell you not to eat that piece of cake or that cheeseburger because that would be quite hypocritical of me. Andrea is a devotee of Weight Watchers and in great shape. She runs. She takes dance classes. Cancer doesn’t pick and choose us based on what we had for breakfast.

Different people come into and out of our lives at different times for different reasons. Please, please appreciate the people in your life. They will be gone all too soon.

2 comments:

Christi said...

Hi. I know we don't know each other but I was a friend of Andrea's. I too am not good at keeping up with people as I should, but I still say we were friends. We knew each other when we were young and went to school together (I mean jr. high and high school) and then A&M too. I have been thinking of her lately and will honor her tomorrow evening at Aggie Muster. I just happened to stumble on your blog some how and had to comment. Thank you for your special words.

Christi

Shannon said...

Hi Christi,

Thank you so much for posting a comment here. I was really surprised when I saw it pop up a few minutes ago since this is an old post.

I've been reading what Scott posted about tomorrow's Aggie Muster on FB and I'll be thinking of you all. I know my friend Diana will be there with her daughter Jessi and I'm sure there will be many more friends and family in attendance for Andrea. I hope you all will have peace tomorrow and joy as well in Andrea's life.

Shannon